Tuesdays with Dory

I don't know how I got here . . .

Dear Dory,

I spent a lot of time putting up my holiday decorations, but my cat seems determined to take them down. What can I do??

Aggravated in Akron

Dear Aggravated,

It seems like you might be new to this whole kitteh thing. Kittehs are firm believers in the old adage "What goes up, must come down." And we like to help.

But if you're determined to have nice holiday decorations, I might have a few tips for you.

First, you can try giving your kitteh a few bits and baubles to play with. If she already has a bow to bat around, she's much less likely to go stealing them off the gifts. Until she loses it, at least. 

Be sure to put sturdier ornaments on the lowest part of the Christmas tree, so when kitteh inevitably pulls them off, they won't break. And just skip the tinsel. We'll always turn it into a snack.

Try to make your kitteh associate scary noises with the decorations. If she goes near the tree to make mischief, start up the vacuum. 

Household decorations, like nutcrackers or Santa statues, may not need tape to stay in place on their own, but you could add a few pieces to discourage kittehs from playing with them. If they don't move right away when we take a swing at them, we'll probably get bored. We also hate getting tape stuck to our paws.
Or, distract your kitteh with egg nog. It's the best!

Happy holidays!